I think maybe i'm trying to do too much and not having the ability to manage it all. And it's really frustrating. I keep want to do more because i want to experience doing this, doing that etc. and i already have a lot on my plate... FOH, dance practices x2, PRACTICING DANCE at home (especially street), twig clubs stuff, tutoring, SCHOOLWORK >__<, volunteering, scholarships. EVERYTHING seems to be piling up and really feeling stressed. but more than that i'm frustrated at myself for not being able to focus and concentrate and prioritize things that i need to have done. i set around doing nothing for awhile because i don't want to start work and it's absolutely terrible when it's 10 at night and haven't done anything. Then i feel frustrated for not having time to do the "fun" things cause i have to do work and now i am really noob at breakdancing when if i had practiced all along i think i would be much better. I let myself down so much.
And then we talked about other people letting us down in sunday school, when people forget things they told you they would do etc. And how we get frustrated at them for stuff like that. but then think about it... how often do we let God down. We say we try to improve, try to do better, don't do this cause we know it's bad, etc. Humans are so imperfect... I think if i stopped letting God down, i would stop letting myself down so much, cause i only really do have myself to blame. Time to get my life together again! and hopefully not have it falling apart too much. At least now i catch myself before i fall too deeply into the whole lazy cycle. Even jo and kevin are being more studious than i am :|
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