so much to be thankful for!

i'm thinking more and more often to open my blog up now.. maybe because i now realize how much i have to be thankful for and how much praise i owe to God that i just want to POST IT AND LET THE WHOLE WORLD KNOW the great things he has done for me. so THANK YOU GOD first and foremost.

anyway it's been a great break thus far. this school year i've been trying to be a more loving person and i think God has always been calling me to show my family that i love them more but because my family is kinda awkward sometimes it has always stopped me... BUT i decided that if i really say that i love God than He is above ALL THINGS, including awkwardness! so i've been trying to not be so temperamental (?) and to just show my appreciation for the things they do.

THEN there's showing love to my friends. i think sometimes it's easy to show love to people you don't really know but to people you know more about, especially their flaws, it's much more difficult. it's been a tough journey i suppose because university kind of caused a falling out in a sense with some of my highschool friends.. the distance, not being on msn, just not talking and seeing each other as much. i guess that made it difficult to love and it was also frustrating to see relationships die... buuuut STILL gotta love! this means a loot of humility and trying to not see people for their flaws!

HUMILITY that was an important lesson.. humbling myself. i was sharing with josh about this and i guess i never really talk about this much but i don't want to be too obnoxious sometimes i guess. i don't want to make people feel left out because i'm being too attention-seeking and i need to humble myself so i don't seek self-glory but rather to bring glory to GOD! and to do things not to seek praise from others, not to be acknowledged but to know that God is pleased with what i'm doing even if no one else does. it's always really difficult to put God on that throne in our lives but it's SOO important so gotta keep at it :)

AND THEN LASTLY i was looking through some old things.. like letters and whatever while i was unpacking and i read some and i really really miss these two people whose letter i read.. esp since i was thinking about summer and hanging out like last summer! i realized i really love these two people and wish for the BEST for them and i hope God is still a priority in their lives :) it's really unfortunate i don't talk to one of them anymore because of how things turned out =S BUT THE OTHER ONE i wrote a letter to... hopefully it was encouraging and not ... annoying. =)

this is suuuch a long post but i feel like i just need to get out everything i'm so thankful for. CCF!!! even though i'm not super tight with eeeveryone or really know anyone super well.. these people are SOO encouraging and so loving. i'm dumb and didn't appreciate these people as much as i could've. i guess like i went to western and met some people at church and they weren't very welcoming and i just felt like..super awkward the whole time :\ and this is NOT hating on western >_< but like i love how even just in frosh cell we try to connect with EVERYONE and yes. thanks to all the froshies mostly (just cause i got to know you guys more than upper years) for being wonderful God-driven people. i feel like i actually see and feel and KNOW your love for God. and it's affected me too =)

KAY i shall end it here. visiting my highschool tomorrow and seeing my buddy =)